With an unapologetically forthright portrayal of this aggressively queer-unfriendly world and xenophobia's generational echoes in North America, Kim Fu stuns with her debut novel.

If one is (very fairly and understandably) looking for a more joyful story (along the lines of If I Was Your Girl by Meredith Russo), that is not this book

(though the ending is happy)

. If one can contend with the emotional challenges and portrayals of queerphobia, I highly recommend this novel. To me, it read as a trans, bildungsroman story prioritizing elucidation and a cogent appeal to compassion of cis readers. This entails certain pros and cons, of course, but I think it feels appropriate considering the author's individual standpoint.

Support a queer author and their incredible debut novel!

Incredible writing! I enjoy a good coming-of-age story and this one was compelling, heartbreaking, and fresh. Hard to believe this was a debut novel! I look forward to reading more from Fu, especially her short story collection, from which she read at the Sask Festival of Words in Moose Jaw. I loved those stories too and am already a big fan of this new-to-me author!

Fu’s writing style was beautiful, ditching linear, western storytelling. As a child of an immigrant parent, the tensions and nuances Fu explored as an ethnic minority really hit home. I was all in all, near ready to exalt my love for this novel. I thought my high 4-rating was locked-in until I finished and felt tricked.

Audrey’s trauma was laid out in detail throughout the book’s entirety, yet her actualisation was crudely skimmed over in a singular paragraph. Her joy, autonomy, and truth never given the space to be celebrated. This felt extremely unbalanced and a silencing of Audrey. 

Secondly, my heart sank when discovering Fu did not consult, or engage, ANY trans folks while penning Audrey’s life as a trans woman. Although agender and part of the gender-expansive/diverse community, I felt Fu (she/he/they) fell short on elevating the trans community’s autonomy over their own story. I perhaps would have cut Fu more slack if their interviews didn’t also deadname Audrey constantly. A review/criticism, far more valid at capturing this point, can be found here https://kara.reviews/for-today-i-am-a-boy/

Lastly, I am still perplexed by Fu’s inclusion of a horrific sexual assault of a minor. Not only was it abruptly and violently inserted within the opening chapter, but to the best of my knowledge, it served NO purpose to the storyline and was absolutely unnecessary.

Randomly picked this one out at the library and I am beyond grateful I did. Really good pacing and prose, it was really hard not to underline so many lines (because it was a library book after all) but this book broke my heart in a million pieces and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I almost couldn’t stomach the young boys’ recess-time play, the sheer physical violence of it—balking with thoughts like... do kids really play like that? 

I didn’t expect to face the terror of a narcissistic authoritarian father figure. Father’s role made all too real the then-later parallels drawn to a relentlessly paternalistic society.

Certainly not a volume that I could step into without a strong, healthful mind. Only in my rejuvenated, relaxed state could I step into Audrey’s world, witness her.  

this book reminds of a series of film photos, just as peter and adele shared back and forth. sad, triumphant, shameful, dissonant pictures that the author expects to be pieced together into a disjointed narrative that honestly i quite liked, though there are parts that were difficult to read. though not too unpredictable, it wasn't really the plot that made this book for me, it was a structure of it. spanning decades, we watch each sister grow out of the dedicated box designed for them. in little pieces, this story unfolds into a novel uniquely told, and simply written. 

though i enjoyed the way the book was written i feel at times the emotion felt a little hidden beneath the writing style. this may have been intentional but it felt a little stilted and made me a little confused at times about the chronology of events. 

the ending paragraph was beautiful though. not a happy ending, but a hopeful one.