I don't even know where to begin with. Rarely have I read a book that made me think of every cliche about romance and made me feel like I'm stuck in a long episode of The Bold and the Beautiful.

Let me start by mentioning how antiquated and wooden this author's writing style is. The dialogues don't feel natural, the characters use weird sayings and phrases every couple of pages. It's like watching actors overacting.

 If nothing else, I’ll have a one-on-one talk with her and tell her how the cow ate the cabbage.

“Excuse me for a couple of minutes. I need to see a man about a dog.”

"I think it's time to get people in town behind us and become a squeaky wheel"

"I would have welcomed that boy with opened arms and slaughtered that fatted calf"

Who talks like that???



 

This book is about rancher Slade and the "love of his life" Vickie who never believed him when he told her he never cheated on her. The heroine chose to believe the woman who told her she had sex with her fiance. And when the hero said "I DID NOT HAVE SEX WITH THAT WOMAN" I had a flashback to the 90s when Bill Clinton said these exact words.
The old hero and heroine keep on saying how well they know each other but I just couldn't see it. Vickie didn't believe a word Slade said. Why did she want to marry him if she knew him so well and could actually believe that the man would cheat on her? It was infuriating.

In between we get some petty revenge pranks, the worst being the hero faking a heart attack. Seriously? It felt more like two kids in the sandbox throwing dirt at one another. And they are supposed to be the mature ones.

This book is written in four different POVs, the other two being about the rancher's deaf foreman and his niece. Unfortunately there seems to have been an error with the blurb because currently there are two up on Goodreads for this book, one of them being about those two. We are being teased with their blooming friendship but no HEA.

My guess is that it's the synopsis for the next book. This is the correct blurb.

Then there are the really stupid lines which I couldn't help but laugh at, and I don't mean that in a haha-it's-so-funny way. It was downright ridiculous.

He’s your son, and if you try to deny that any longer, I’ll steal some of your DNA to prove it.”

The characters weren't exactly likable and Vickie was the worst of the bunch. Ignorant, aggressive, childish, annoying and self-righteous. She kept insisting how Slade was a bastard for not acknowledging his son although he said numerous times that HE DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT HIM. It was the same thing she did to him not believing that he hadn't cheated on her. And the ending? Oh, right, you didn't cheat, sorry, all good, you gonna marry me now or what?

This is one of the weirdest and worst books I've read in recent years (and those who know me know that I don't say something like this lightly) and I didn't even mention everything that was bothering me - it was almost 500 pages of inane prose and I have no idea why I didn't DNF. I don't care enough to continue with the deaf guy and his love interest. Unfortunately this author did nothing to encourage me to read another book by her.