I’m on the fence with this one. I thought the themes were incredibly strong. Song presented a wonderfully complex protagonist, Ren Yu, dealing with the tribulations of competitive high school swimming. The complexity of her character really came together due to Song’s thorough exploration of Ren’s multifaceted identity: feeling the pressure to succeed as the daughter of Chinese immigrants (and dealing with microaggressions on top of that), discovering queer intimacies in (and out of) the pool, as well as dealing with the discomforts of being a teenage girl whose body is heavily scrutinized and how it’s (mis)treated. You don’t have to like Ren—I admit I wasn’t the biggest fan of her—but you can’t deny that she’s a well-developed character.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t as taken to the plot and execution. I wasn’t quite certain what Song wanted the reader to get from this book. At its core, the book focuses on Ren’s desire to get out of her human body in order to become a mermaid. There isn’t much reflection on this, though, especially the why any of it mattered. I wasn’t entirely convinced by the use of fantastical elements to craft this longing because I didn’t understand the motivation. Ultimately, I think what I’m trying to say is that I wish this part of the book was developed more and that there was more backstory.

This was an interesting book. It didn’t entirely work for me, but I didn’t think it was mediocre or anything. One thing I will say is to pay particular attention to the content warnings. Song doesn’t embellish in their writing.

Note: I received an ARC from a giveaway.

Still really processing what I read, but it was impactful. On the one hand, I am kinda grossed out by what I listened to, but on the other hand, isn't that kind of the point? Ren goes through some pretty dark moments as she tries to learn who she wants to become.

As someone who is typically pretty good with most content, I was pretty triggered by a lot of things in this book. Please be wary before picking this up.