this book made me cry so hard it gave me a headache, of course i enjoyed it. i saw too much of myself in jax, the mental illness of it all really got to me. the spiraling. the self-sabotage. the suicide ideation (and attempt). which is why i wish he had gotten help for himself rather than his family. not that any reason to get help isn't valid. what matters is that it did. but what makes a difference in the long run is if he's getting better for himself. otherwise, if something were to happen to his family and he lost "his reason to live" (his own words), all his progress might vanish with them. is it good he found something to live for? absolutely. but he should want to live for himself. plus, having another character self-harm to pull him off the ledge was very triggering. i'm aware this is fiction, but that bordered too much on romanticizing mental illness to me personally. trauma bonding is one thing, being willing to hurt yourself so another person doesn't end his life is another. that's harmful and manipulative for both their mental health. and it wasn't addressed. just like his therapy journey wasn't shown, just told. i believe that was the biggest disservice within the story.