Oh boy oh boy, I've got thoughts.

I enjoyed the first book far more but this one's left me with a lot of concerns, particularly because I've looked over some other reviews for this series when I was trying to search for a specific term.

Let's start with the easiest thing. There is graphic depictions of sexual assault and non-con/rape in this book, and if that is a trigger or deal-breaker for you, don't read this. If not but you still want a warning of what to skip and you are reading a paperback copy by Seven Seas of this, here is your warning to skip chapters 51, 52 and 53, and tread cautiously with chapter 54, which is the immediate aftermath. I want to make something abundantly clear, and I apologize if this review starts to go into spoiler territory even mildly, but I was aware at the offset that this was going to be a book series that dealt with a toxic relationship and imbalanced power dynamics. I am not at all surprised that this content is within these books, especially such a dire emphasis is placed (even from the first book) on the fact that both of these characters aggressively consider themselves straight and tout their homophobia on the page. And again, I am not surprised that this sort of content exists within a story about the toxic relationship between a doctor and his former mental patient in a danmei. I've read enough yaoi in my lifetime that my overall response to this being here is more of a "Disappointed but not surprised"; what I will say, what I am getting at, is that I'm a bit stunned that it happened this early on in the story (let alone that it was drawn out for three chapters, what the actual hell.)

The thing is that most of the reviews I saw that were criticizing this book for that content were somewhat alarming in their own right. Many of them felt like they were so solely focused on this, and very few acknowledged that 1: both characters feed into the toxic and unhealthy aspects of their relationship, 2: this series makes no effort to hide the fact that that is what you're getting into with it, or 3: the way that ableism is so deeply rooted in the issues present in that relationship, and that that is a theme being highlighted.

Perhaps this is somewhat pessimistic and negative of me to say, but with the previous installment in this publication, I had been wondering when (if at all) the conversation of ableism existing within the relationship between the Main Character and the Male Lead was going to come up. The seeds were present throughout the first book, so I'd been waiting for the other shoe to drop and in this part it has. The book itself drags it out into the light and points out how the ML's ableist mindset and fear of mental patients, including those seeking treatment from him, has caused harm, isn't okay, and it now has a drastic impact on the MC.

But I don't see people bringing that up when they cover their grievances with Bing An Ben. It almost is like they're trying to ignore or divorce that from the discussion, and I don't think that really is fair. It's so interwoven into everything here that to leave it out feels inadequate. Sure, the MC's mental condition is fictional (much like DC comics with their dreaded MacGregor's Syndrome,) but a lot of the symptoms, struggles, experiences and need for coping mechanisms that the MC faces are very reflective of a multitude of different neurodivergences. It's so integral, so much a part of what's going on in this story and so vital to it, I feel like it needs to be acknowledged.

And I'm not saying forgive the MC for any of the shit he does, or forgive the ML for any of the shit he does. But we know for a fact the MC struggles with mental illness, and there are heavy signs that the ML also struggles with an undiagnosed mental illness/neurodivergence of his own, and I don't think those things should be discounted or left out of the discussion either. It impacts both their characters and their interactions with one another.

And Meatbun doesn't shy away from the fact that's what she's writing about. That's also kind of crucial.

At present, I am still going to go through this. The plot outside of the toxic relationship between the MC and ML intrigues me, and I want to see where that goes and what role they end up playing in it. I don't ship them in the slightest and can't get behind the idea that they're a romance, though. Nothing in the writing has so far convinced me of that and I don't particularly like the thought of this potentially becoming a sweet romance. I can't get behind that.