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A review by ladyofways
Gulliver of Mars by Edwin Lester Arnold
2.0
The tl;dr version of my opinion is: Fuck Gulliver. John Carter is best!
Long form: Yeah, okay, so ERB probably did somehow read Gulliver and was inspired to write a book about a military man who travels to Mars and meets the cultures and saves a Princess. But Arnold's version is BORING, and Gulliver is annoying. There are only two cultures. The Hither folk are basically socially degenerating Lotus Eaters who are lazy and don't do anything because that would be too hard. They are beautiful but bland. The Thither folk (and granted, if you're going to have a dichotomy I liked the names) are brutish, hairy Neanderthals who are gradually taking over the planet and driving the Hither folk out. Gulliver is a boring nothing of a man who spends the whole trip wandering around, whining, looking at stuff, and NEVER FIGHTING ANYONE. He has two scenes where he punches an enemy. TWO in the WHOLE BOOK. He carries a navy sword around but never draws it, and at the end he runs away like a punk. Princess Heru is consistently described like either an object, a child, a possession, or a ghost, frequently without even using her name, and he doesn't even end up with her by the end. His inability to devote himself to a single love interest is maddening, especially with the incomparable Dejah Thoris casting such a long shadow. Arnold seems almost to hate the world he's created. When Gulliver gets back, he immediately gets back with his dumb Earth girlfriend "Polly" and apparently lives boringly ever after.
There's some evidence in the preface to indicate that I should read Phra the Phonecian (Arnold's other book) because that character may have been more of a character inspiration for John Carter. Maybe I would find it less maddening, but boo for Gulliver and boo for this book.
Long form: Yeah, okay, so ERB probably did somehow read Gulliver and was inspired to write a book about a military man who travels to Mars and meets the cultures and saves a Princess. But Arnold's version is BORING, and Gulliver is annoying. There are only two cultures. The Hither folk are basically socially degenerating Lotus Eaters who are lazy and don't do anything because that would be too hard. They are beautiful but bland. The Thither folk (and granted, if you're going to have a dichotomy I liked the names) are brutish, hairy Neanderthals who are gradually taking over the planet and driving the Hither folk out. Gulliver is a boring nothing of a man who spends the whole trip wandering around, whining, looking at stuff, and NEVER FIGHTING ANYONE. He has two scenes where he punches an enemy. TWO in the WHOLE BOOK. He carries a navy sword around but never draws it, and at the end he runs away like a punk. Princess Heru is consistently described like either an object, a child, a possession, or a ghost, frequently without even using her name, and he doesn't even end up with her by the end. His inability to devote himself to a single love interest is maddening, especially with the incomparable Dejah Thoris casting such a long shadow. Arnold seems almost to hate the world he's created. When Gulliver gets back, he immediately gets back with his dumb Earth girlfriend "Polly" and apparently lives boringly ever after.
There's some evidence in the preface to indicate that I should read Phra the Phonecian (Arnold's other book) because that character may have been more of a character inspiration for John Carter. Maybe I would find it less maddening, but boo for Gulliver and boo for this book.