thank you to viking books for young readers and penguinteen for an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

do you ever have those moments where you have to sit and process everything that’s just happened in a book because you absolutely devoured it. that’s exactly what happened with wish you weren’t here. amazing, i read this book in under two days, a feat which i almost never do just to having no time in the world anymore. but this lovely little book broke through that barrier. i couldn’t tell you the last time i read a book so fast. truly.

so of course it took me a few days to gather all my thoughts on everything. figure out how much i loved this book. figure out my feelings on juliette and priya’s relationship. on juliette’s camp experience, which this was truly one big beautiful ode to….

let’s start with juliette’s camp experience because i can relate to her thoughts fairly well. while i never went to camp the way she did, where it was outdoorsy, and you go there every summer for every year (i was in summer sports so that wasn’t really an option!) but i did do a few specialized camps in high school, for the sciences, which i did then work at when i was in college. so i recognize juliette’s pure passion and joy during her experiences. how something she held so dearly can so quickly turn sour by the little things (a counselor who has a vendetta against you, an injury, the girl you definitely don’t like showing up). i think her absolute love made her often justifiably protective when it came to everything about camp. and maybe something that hindered her a bit since she could get so hung up on her ideal experience.

and i think that would be the only way she would ever be “too much” because although others were supposedly telling her this left and right off page, it’s not something that we ever really saw. i mean, in the opening scene she talks about NOT being able to advocate for herself as a child, even if in teenage years that particular scenario (her name) is something that she did get better about. but how much of that was internalizing what she perceived as true rather than her actual personality. because if she would’ve been, i think she might have caused a lot more outwardly responses to gallahad’s poor counselor decisions much earlier than she did (and did she even really? or was it just priya and her other firend’s that exposed those wrong-doings). i do think, this thought about herself really did lesson many of the enjoyment and love i have for juliette. it made it difficult to be on her side when she’d think one thing and do something completely opposite. and that trait was what pulled her through a lot of her actions, even with priya.

so let’s get into their relationship. i’m sure i’m going to have similar thoughts to others when i say, i don’t understand what juliette’s issue was with priya in the beginning lol. like they’re very clearly like classmate acquaintances where one (juliette) has a bit of a jealousy problem and the other (priya) wants to become closer but doesn’t really know how to best approach the situation. i honestly think i would’ve enjoyed it so much if we dropped this non-issue of juliette kinda sorta disliking priya but for no valid reasons other than she’s popular(?). i think it would’ve been my perfect story if juliette just truly was like, there’s this girl. she’s super popular and sort of an influencer. and we kinda sorta run in the same circles but there’s never been a strong connection. and i’m sure that it was written the way it was because it conveys juliette’s pent up feelings FOR her, romantically, but i would’ve found it all that more believable had this just been the chance for them to connect. even if they run in similar circles and act polite at birthdays. having that weird dynamic removed would have made this a top tier story for me.

listen, this isn’t me saying that i didn’t love this story because i absolutely did. i just think that these were two aspects that is why i wouldn’t hold this higher than a four star rating personally. because i truly loved all the camp shenanigans. the activities. the way juliette was stubborn enough to try and continue to make the most of her summer even when things tried to stop her. and i LOVED the romance. they were so cute when they started to flirt with each other, the way juliette just never got it(TM). we were able to see their quirky sides, in this enclosed setting. how they were able to relate to similar life experiences, like their mixed-heritage, their similar life goals, etc. and it was truly just such a fun time. but if these small changes were made, it would have easily been a five star for me!

but overall, let it be known that i’m beyond excited to see what baldwin writes next. i know in my heart that she can become a favorite author of mine down the road.