Sierra Simone really knows how to rip your heart out of your chest and really make you feel like she's going to toss it into a fiery pit of despair, BUT THEN, she somehow puts it back into your chest and stitches it up until you feel like the slight scar and pain was worth it for how much better your heart feels afterwards.

Gah, this book. These two. And for all the darkness, gosh there were some really funny moments. Aiden, the lumberjack monk that he is, has the deep sense of humor running through his pain. Truly the one who lights up the room, making this discovery of his struggle with depression all the more palpably real.

The way Sierra Simone also weaves faith into these stories, it just really hits my lapsed Catholic soul in ways that other writers can't. I only wish Catholic faith were the version Sierra creates in her worlds. A place were a queer man can find family, love, and acceptance, not in spite of his sexuality. Where one can find connection to a G-d and a faith that doesn't also make you feel ashamed.

I am going to re-read this one. Exquisite sentences, I highlighted so much. Sinner is still my top tier favorite but this is right there with it.

Als0 - the scene in the lavender field will live rent-free with me forever.

CWs - suicide (family member in the past, described suicideal ideation and mental health struggles); aesthetic suffering, described, discussion of homophobic worries/fears of being outed/fears of being caught, religious violence/persecution - discussed. Rape - in the past, secondary character. Deceased family members/complications of grieving. Cheating (main character is in a relationship when they reconnect for the first time physically with the main love interest).