A review by labalkana
The Man I Thought You Were by Leah Mercer

3.0

Anna had a good life, a routine, a picture perfect marriage, a loving husband. Until one day Mark came home and out of nothing, he tells her where to find everything and just walked out of the life they've built.
With no way to contact him, no one knowing where could be or what happened, his father, whom she never met before, whom he didn't talk to for 13 years, helps her looking for him.

But Mark doesn't want to be found. From the first moment of his diagnosis he knew he couldn't put her through this, just as he couldn't let her know about his past. His only mission now is to find the baby he gave up on long ago, to tell the girl how sorry he is for failing her and her mother.

This story really surprised me. From the blurb I expected something completely different. It really was one of the saddest stories I've ever read, heavy on emotion and deep but I didn't enjoy it. There's some second chances, forgiveness and hope but really, it's just depressing and tragic.

Everything about this is tragic, circumstances and decisions. Like Marks past and how things went down, how something good happened and he never allowed himself to learn. Like her sisters story, Annas walking out on her when she needed help and how she interfered, like his reaction to her, hitting the mark without knowing. Plus as good as it gets his biggest wishes coming true, right before his time is up and them doing the end together is still tragic.

I understood the characters, most of their actions and the conclusions they made but it's exhausting, having one bad thing after the other. The sister is the best example for that. Having a man, thrown out by his wife and moving in with his girlfriend would make a good storyline or side aspect or whatever, ironic as it is. Here it just adds to the dragging-down.

And how do you just walk away from your life? I mean no one can believe you could walk out on someone without the other looking for you. He did the same with his family before though, so he's used to it. And it all sounds so surreal, that it could really happen.
But I absolutely hate the well-intended protecting the significant other from something bad. Leave the decision up to them, dammit. In his case, he didn't only deny her these last few months but also took all the good memories. And that makes it selfish.

I did think a lot about this one after finishing, though. It might be a good read, just not enjoyable.