alicedroni's reviews
64 reviews

Made me think about my relationship with my mom a lot more than i wanted to while thinking about my dating life hahaha

I think this book brings up a lot of really great questions and self-reflection topics. Like all polyamory books I'd absolutely recommend this to my monogamous friends as well, i think it has a great view on dealing with attachment both within oneself and in a general sense of relations with others. i found a lot of my secure attachments lie within platonic friendships and it's nice to decouple this from a mono-normative lens.

Love a good angry manifesto, hate how relatable it all is.

This book was for someone, and that someone was not me. 

Its not like she has bad observations, they're just incredibly normative. If you're queer, poly, aromantic, childfree, anti-marriage, or any combination of those, you wont find anyone you relate to in this book. At the beginning of the book she mentions asking for help representing queer folks, and though there are technically two queer couples mentioned, both are extremely upper middle class, typical married couples and are essentially indistinguishable from a regular heterosexual married couple.

Her main hypothesis about desire and intimacy being separate feelings seems like an extremely simplified and hetero-normative version of the split attraction model many queer theory and aro/ace books talk about (and I think generally do a better job of explaining).

I put off reading this book for a while since I was struggling through burnout at my job and finally picked it up when i finally decided to quit and it was the perfect read. 

Even if you don't work a specifically "bullshit job" yourself, there are a lot of great observations about work culture as a whole that can benefit most readers. It also has a ton of personal stories that are both eye opening, entertaining, and relatable. 

I really enjoyed this at the start, but it did feel a bit repetitive at a certain point and became a bit hard to finish imo. Its a really cool perspective on the plant world and overall super worthwhile information.

Really interesting first hand account, but a bit difficult to read since it's written as a transcript and English is obviously no one's first language

Even though I'm pretty familiar with a lot of the concepts in this book it's so nice to hear other people's experiences, and a huge range of different ways to practice unconventional relationships. I honestly want everyone I ever date to read this book.