amelianotthepilot's reviews
739 reviews

a bit long but i can see how it would be a spectacular stage show 
i don’t know how they would do the multiple scene changes

follows the story of antony and cleopatra. It starts with their love in egypt but antony returns to rome to deal with conflict with caesar. they solve their conflict with a marriage. Antony was recently widowed and now marries Caesar’s sister Octavia. Cleopatra finds out and is upset.
?A war happens? and Antony goes to Cleopatra. Antony battles Caesar on sea but retreats like a coward. Then they fight again and he thinks he’s winning but he was tricked. He thinks cleopatra tricked him and orders her killed but she hides. After realizing what he’s done he wants to die too but none of his lieutenants will do it so he stabs himself but misses. He is carried to Cleopatra and dies in her arms.
Now Caesar has successfully won and wishes to parade Cleopatra around as a trophy of the battle but she realizes this and kill’s herself by snake.

I honestly don’t know too much about this history and have no idea if it’s accurate but it sure is wild

uncle rick never misses

every single one of his books is such ana amazing adventure story filled with representation and dad jokes galore. i feel fortunate to have grown up with PJ books and that they’re still enjoyable to read as an adult

this one sucked and is a bit too relevant

it starts with the government enforcing a new law declaring that if you have a baby out of wedlock you go to jail. Claudio is betrothed to Juliet but they get pregnant before they are married and both are sent to jail. Claudio’s sister, Isabella, is informed of this and leaves her nunnery to go petition  the deputy. However the deputy is corrupt and declares that if Isabella wishes to save Claudio she must sleep with him. Isabella refuses and then goes to visit Claudio and tell him about this. Claudio then tells her that she should sleep with the deputy to save him. 🙄
The Duke disguised as a Friar overhears all this and decides to help. He makes a grand scheme and decides a girl named Mariana who likes the deputy should sleep with him and pretend to be Isabella and this will save Claudio 😒
So Mariana sleeps with the deputy but then the deputy decides to kill Claudio anyway and demands his head. The Duke prevents this and decides to send another prisoners head but that prisoner doesn’t want to die so they send a corpse’s head. 
They then hold a trial in which the Duke unveils himself and exposes the whole plot. He forces the deputy to marry Mariana and then beheads the deputy for his crimes. 
Then in the very last two lines ?i think he makes a move on Isabella??

this play was a mess lol

also there’s a character named elbow

god this book was so bad

i dunno what y’all tiktok girlies are on this book was trash

from beginning to end there is no plot and the character are annoying. SJM has recycled the characters of Throne of Glass and put them in pretty much the same situation. but this time she has also recycled every fairytale she can think of. Feyre is in a cinderella situation in the beginning and then in a beauty and the beast kidnap stockholm syndrome situation and then yet again is playing cinderella. 

She for some reason is in love with a walking red flag #TamelinHateClub who from the beginning was terrible to her. 

Yet again SJM doesn’t give her characters any Wants which means the whole book has no goal or plot and the characters are wishy washy. Feyre’s main want was to protect her family but that’s essentially immediately solved when Tamelin guarantees he’s taking care of them and then she forgets they exist and then remembers again but he reassures her and this happens over and over for no reason.

Her familial situation makes 0 sense. She is the youngest and yet her siblings and father treat her like trash and refuse to help even though they are literally starving poor.

People constantly assume she knows things but she’s an idiot and they also don’t tell her anything. But the whole curse revolves around her. She also couldn’t figure out The Easiest riddle I have ever heard.

Also she’s coming for Lea Michelle’s brand by not being able to read which was such an odd plot point. 

I absolutely hate that she paints and all of her “paintings” sound like little kid fingerpaints or like that girl you went to high school with who is now trying to make some money on the side by “painting pictures of you with your friends”. She thinks she’s an artist. Literally no one has asked her to paint them. Painter girl is the equivalent of guitar guy, she always talks about painting people but no one asked. 

the spicy scenes were bizarre and were actually just straight up sexual assault and harassment.

what the hell is up with the worm tho


some <SPOILERS> follow

List of things recycled from Throne of Glass (which was also a bad series)
-tattoos given to her by her man’s
-being kidnapped
-being a bad ass female who can hunt and take care of herself but is an idiot and constantly getting into such terrible situations and is actually helpless and has to be rescued
-every other female character is terrible and written so that the reader hates them
-reverse harem
-a queen fae is lording over a group of hot men fae and she is evil
-hot men fae are territorial and bite and want her
-she’s “so average” but in a hot way
-she starts as human but eventually is fae (i predict she will become queen eventually)
-she’s badass but also lovesss dresses and luxury but pretends to hate it


My one and only favorite thing was when she found out there was actually people in the Spring Court mansion and they could see her this whole time but she was tip toeing around like a fool.

this book was so anti jewish it was pretty much unreadable. the only jewish character is vilified from the start and then constantly verbally abused the whole play.

besides that the plot is also boring as hell. Bassano wants to marry the most beautiful woman of the land, Portia, but he can’t afford to go to her town. So his best friend, Antonio, funds him by taking out a loan with the jewish man, Shylock. Meanwhile Portia has a test set out for all her suitors

boring plot with obvious conclusion but at least the women had a good role in this plot. at the end without the womens help the men would have failed. but the women came in disguised as men and thwarted the jew.  this book was bad 

Not as exciting as her other books.

Follows Anne who is the third daughter of a Sir who has mismanaged his money and estate and now needs to rent it out to support it. 

Anne was in love with Mr. Wentworth 8 years ago but he was a young poor sailor with no property or money and so the match was deemed unsuitable. Now 8 years later they come in to each others lives again. Will they find each other again? …well it is an austen book….

a view into the struggles of being a trans person, pregnancy, queer relationships, and detransitioning. a modern story of family and love.

it was ok
characters were sorta boring 
big trial case at the end and i don’t like court books they’re always trying to say something and it’s boring
ending was corny 

this one’s eh
skip it

it follows a physicians daughter, Helena, and a lords son, Bertram. the physician and the lord dies. helena is in love with the bertram but is below his ranking and schemes to marry him. the king of france is i’ll so she goes to him and makes a bargain. if she can heal the king he will allow her to marry anyone no matter their status. Helena does and chooses Bertram but he is very upset by this. he marries her legally in the court since the king demands it but then he refuses to seal the marriage by bedding her and instead runs off to italy to become a soldier. She follows with another scheme. He is courting a lady named Diana. Helena happens to find Diana and they scheme. Diana will get Bertrams ring and agree to sleep with him. But instead Helena will sleep with him and take his ring. Then they will be truly wed. 

honestly bertram sucks and helena is manipulative. also there’s a lot of discourse in virginity in this one which was boring and outdated