bookreviewswithkb's reviews
592 reviews

this is a reflective, thought-provoking, and insightful collection - on what it means to be visible in a society that’s done everything it can to make you invisible, the compounding effects of racism at the individual and societal level, the aggression towards Black people in america, and the way Black people move through and manage pain. it’s an exploration of the connections between the everyday inflictions of racism and the tragedies created through that giving way for Hurricane Katrina and the murder of Trayvon Martin and so much more 

i really loved this novel. it felt so empowering to read. the characters are relatable and lovely and the neurodivergent representation is so good. it’s for the ones who are afraid to speak up, or who can’t. for the ones who are trying to put words to an experience of rape that they didn’t define as rape when it happened because the conditioning we are all exposed to makes us deny our own experiences. for the ones who want to be a voice. for the ones who are angry and the ones who are tired

and also love the author’s content warning at the beginning and the inclusion of resources for anyone who might read this book and need support 

this review contains heartfelt vulnerability, rambling included. the short version - i cannot recommend this book enough

We Were Once a Family is a searing work of journalism. Asgarian takes such great care in her writing, tenderly examining the intricately tied systemic issues that present themselves within the child welfare system, the unimaginable harm that the system inflicts on the children and families it claims to protect, and then pathologizes their responses to that harm. it’s a system filled with racism and abuse that needs to be abolished just as every other system in the united states needs to be abolished. the pain and the hurt experienced by the birth families of the 6 adopted children who were murdered by the Harts absolutely bleeds off the pages. i could feel my heart racing, constricting, each time i picked this book up. and i really appreciated the willingness to explore the harm adoption can create and of the protection that adoptive parents often hide behind because of the narrative ascribed to them

on a more personal note, Asgarian stamped down everything i see and feel on a daily basis working as a therapist in a residential treatment facility. i see the very abuse and harm she exposes, in real time and i vacillate constantly between staying and going, between thinking i must be wrong and knowing i’m not, between wanting to provide trauma treatment and knowing you can’t be treated in the same system that’s causing your trauma. blurring between complicity and dismantling from the inside so much that i feel like i can’t see through

i’m doubled over with a constriction in my heart 

i appreciated reading the author’s story as she explored the expectations placed upon her by herself, her family, and society, particularly as it relates to her education and career in order to provide the life of her parent’s dreams. Guitierrez makes some astute observations about separation, longing, and mental but it lacks the level of reflection and detail that i enjoy in memoirs. it was interesting, but not compelling. it almost reads more like a young adult memoir 

a compelling memoir that explores the personal accounts of the author and her family, with a weaving of relevant historical events, giving the reader a chance to comprehend the practical impacts of the racism and oppression inflicted on Native communities. it’s a meditation on the push and pull of assimilation, the reckoning of indifference, but also the power of family and culture, and how necessary it is for us to be educated on the realities of the harm that white people have inflicted, and continue to inflict, on Indigenous communities 

 thank you to @booksparks for the #gifted copy as part of the #SPRC2024 lineup! 

this is a moving novel that explores trans identity in a really beautiful way. the author offers poignant reflections on class, identity, poverty, violence against women. it’s about the ways we slowly come to understand we have to hide who we are, how to keep ourselves safe from those who refuse to honor our identities, the ways we find acceptance in the people who truly see us 

“just like at four or five years old, when you already sense that something in you is different, you hear your parents or your neighbors making comments that - you don’t know why - hurt you and you never forget. words wielded casually that transform into barbed wire that blocks your way and limits your world forever…”

“only a small difference in sound separates “leave” from “live.”

this novel is an examination of how we can become tools of oppression, how we can be brutalized and made into weapons of destruction, how the power can beat us into a submission we never knew we were capable of. the terror of grief and loss, of the lengths we will go to when we are left without choices. this novel is beautifully written but it does seem that the author ignores the class and race structures in Venezuela which limited the scope of understanding of the political circumstances that created the violence and destruction the protagonist is navigating 

“Living: a miracle that I still don’t understand fully, one that grabs hold with the teeth of guilt. Surviving is part of the horror that travels with anyone who escapes. A plague that strives to bring us down when we’re healthy, to remind us that someone else was more deserving of staying alive.”

thank you so much to @booksparks for the #gifted copy for the #SPRC2024 lineup 💜

this collection is absolutely beautiful. emotional, metaphorical and mesmerizing. Gibson writes of chronic illness, of racism, religion, of love in its many forms. she explores her experience living as a Black woman, trying to navigate the racist and sexist united states healthcare system, trying to navigate motherhood, trying to understand the past that has given way to her present moment. the craft and style of the poems are stunning; many of her lines took my breath away. i highly recommend this collection! 

“the way the birds remind us to wake up, to look up, is a kind of love. love is a choice and a destiny, instinctive and insane, humble and courageous, of body and mind.”

thank you so much to @booksparks for the #gifted copy for the #SPRC2024 reading challenge 💜

originally published in 2021 in Nigeria and now available in the U.S.

this is certainly not my usual kind of read and i appreciate that it’s outside of my comfort zone. it’s a really quick read full of spice - a collection of short stories exploring the madness of the men in Lagos through horrendous dating experiences and relationships filled with betrayal. i spent the entirety of reading this collection rooting for women, holding my breath, rolling my eyes, and admiring the author’s wittiness

cw: there is a lot of sexually graphic content in this novel as well as a detailed description of rape 

this is such a good coming-of-age novel that explores the history of Brujería (witchcraft) particularly in the Dominican Republic, the power of ancestors, and of trusting ourselves. the ways we rely on each other, and how we care for one another. it’s rooted in tradition and culture and community. a really beautiful and wonderful book