gaylandtoo's reviews
101 reviews

the parents in this book are what made the book so extremely special. i think it sends such a hopeful message to young queer kids who might be struggling with an unsupportive environment.

the parallels between ari and dante coming to terms with their sexuality truly shows that no coming out story is the same. i cried the entire time, and i loved every second. i think this is the fastest i've ever finished a book.

so i hate this book. i don't hate it because they use outdated language or because the main character (regan) misgenders her sister throughout half of it. i hate it because it does not represent luna, the trans character, as a multidimensional human being who is struggling. it represents regan, a cishet girl, and her struggle to "understand" and "deal with" having a trans sister. the entire book is about regan's struggle. maybe in the last 50 pages does the book go into detail about how luna struggles within her relationships.

regan is also an entirely unlikable character. i understand the book was written in 2004 for teenage girls as the intended audience, however regan is SO selfish and insufferable. she blames her sister being trans for all of her problems, and she makes the entire situation about herself. i don't care if that was realistic, it is genuinely unlikable and horrible to read. what kind of hope is that setting up for young trans kids? that they're going to be a nuisance in the lives of those they love and confide in?

tw// mentions of suicide

the ending was also pretty terrible. luna decides to leave her family on her 18th birthday, which is valid. her dad sucks major ass and her mom may or may not have conspired to help her commit suicide. however, once again, i don't like the message this novel gives to young trans readers. or young cisgender readers. or any reader. ever. it just is not good. it's annoying, uses unnecessary slurs, and it is shitty representation. i felt masochistic making myself finish it.

i cannot reiterate this enough: i can tell when a book with trans representation was written by a trans person who has lived that experience. meredith russo does a phenomenal job at showing cis readers the trauma and hardships trans people face.

i'm so thankful, so SO thankful, amanda does not forgive grant immediately. or maybe ever. i'm also so thankful she realizes she deserves love because she does! she's such a sweet, caring person. she's so kind and gentle and wonderful. i'm also so thankful that meredith makes the fantastic point of saying amanda is not brave for being herself. as a queer person, that's my number one pet peeve. i despise when people tell me i am brave for doing nothing but existing authentically.

granted, i have some issue with how well amanda can pass. only because im not sure how authentic it is to the character or her situation. i'm aware that it is useful to the story and showing cis people how trans people can be singled out and abused, even if they are passing. so i don't knock much points off for it.

i also took a little bit of issue with bee outing like... literally everyone and amanda in front of the school. it's a YA novel. we need the drama. i'm sure this has happened somewhere. i am a 21 year old reading a book intended for 16 year olds, so i am a little nit-picky with the second hand embarrassment plot lines.

the supportive parents are perfectly written. i think showing amanda's mom grieving her "son" because she is growing up and changing is so perfectly executed. it made me cry so hard. the mom's reaction to her trans daughter is something i wish i would have gotten when being outed to my parents.

let's talk lesbians. CHLOE. chloe chloe chloe. chloe my beloved. she's an angel! a redhead with a southern accent? exactly my type. actually reading in a book how she felt so isolated when she was little because she did not know there could be other gay people than herself... i felt like meredith russo spied on my childhood. SO PERFECTLY WRITTEN!!!!

this book is so, so good. meredith russo, if for whatever reason you see this review, please know your author's notes made me cry so hard. you don't know me, but it means so much to me to hear an adult tell me it's okay that i'm a lesbian. it's okay that i'm nonbinary. it's okay and i deserve to be loved. so thank you for that.

i wish i could give this book a 4.5 rating but alas, goodreads hates me and will only allow for 4/5. but there's an extra .5 from my heart.

i loved this book. predictable, cheesy, adorable. not my favorite book ever, but i can't wait to recommend it to a student someday. i think it would've hit a lot closer to home if i was still a teenager, but alas, i am 21, and prestigious. i still adore it, so so sweet.