I may not have read this book at the right time.
After a couple of Gillian Flynn novels, I seem to have over-saturated on the old suspense formula.
Even so, I'm not sure I would have been overly impressed anyway. This was exactly the type of novel where you know there must be one or two *GASP* moments just around the corner.
Ehh, not so much. I found the story to be kind of predictable, and I doubt I'll remember a whole lot from it as time goes by.

I will say, though, that for a first novel, Elizabeth Haynes certainly has the goods for writing this genre. I really was burning through the pages, so I have to give credit where credit is due. She can write suspense.

Also, placing the reader into the perspective of a lady with severe OCD and PTSD was fantastic. In fact, as I was breezing along, the ratings meter was set to cruise at 4 stars, with consideration of 5 stars if she wrapped it up with a punch to my face.
This isn't really a spoiler, but just how I felt about the ending.
So, look if you want.

Spoiler

When I closed the book (I mean, hit Home on the Kindle), it was a fine resolution, but I was left with a, "well, I'm finished", as opposed to, "Oh my God. Wow." and I was thinking of docking a star. Hmm.

I've stopped typing for a few minutes.

You know, the OCD stuff was very well done. She deserves better than 3. So 4 it stays.

Wow! Definitely would have read faster if I didn't have other things going on. This book had me hooked from the beginning, the way it was written, the twists, the perspective. So so good!!

This was my first reading Haynes' work, as is the first novel for her as well. And I must say this gave me chills. At first you don't realize why Cathy is the way she is. And then once it unfolds you can understand her condition. She completely evolves in so many ways throughout the story. At first, she's a single, outgoing, carefree happy woman. Then things happen and she turns, building this horrifying, scared, and self-tortuous world. What she experienced, I start to emotionally empathize with her. Then as she meets Stuart and others who help her manage and take back her life, you start to root for her and just feel so good she's taking control. At times, I was really freaked out....made me want to start locking and checking MY doors and windows!

So when a writer can convey that and make the reader feel, you know she's doing something right. I trust more stories by Haynes will deliver as well. Looking forward to it...I give it 3.5 stars. :)

Creepy and mesmerizing, this suspenseful novel gives the reader a taste of the horrors of domestic abuse. In typical fashion the main character, Catherine, falls for a dashing and exciting lover--Lee. He is somewhat mysterious but at first that only adds to his charm. However he begins to do odd things like break into her apartment when she isn't there. The interesting thing about this novel is that at the same time as we are getting this backstory, we are also hearing from present day Catherine, who is suffering from the after effects of this relationship--the main one being that she has OCD and can barely leave her flat. She does have a job but has to check the apartment and her doors multiple times before she can leave and when she returns. I found the details about her OCD somewhat fascinating, however this part of the novel does get repetitive (that's kind of the point). Anyway, as the reader learns more and more about what a manipulative creep Lee is from the chapters set in the past, it also begins to become apparent that Lee is going to make a reappearance into Catherine's life in her present day. However, in the past she was alone and weak--in the present she gains an ally in in the form of a handsome new neighbor named Stuart. Stuart helps her get treatment for her OCD and believes in her ability to overcome her past. But will it be enough when Lee comes calling?
This book truly had me on pins and needles as I wondered how it was all going to play out. Lee's ability to manipulate Catherine's friends was maddening and Catherine was definitely backed into a corner with few options. I did have a few quibbles, especially with how perfect Stuart and how conveniently he was placed into her life--that part did not come across as totally believable. I did appreciate how it ended, however. I recommend this on ror those times that you are in the mood for a book that will send shivers up your spine and keep you in suspense.

Nachdem nach Buch in zig Kapiteln immer wieder von vorne anfängt, geht es endlich los. Zwei aufeinanderfolgende Kapitel aus der gleichen Perspektive. Und schon nervt mich die Tante total. Altbekannte Formel, dummes Weibchen, böser Psycho. Nope.

Fantastic and un-put-downable. Started in on Friday and finished it on Saturday. Well written, and the juxtaposition between past and present was extremely well done. WOuld recommend.

Had I been dreaming about him, or had he really been here? All I could see was him: his whole weight on top of me, pinning me down. I imagined those handcuffs, which had already broken the skin of my wrists, cutting into my swollen flesh. The smell of him; stale alcohol breathing into my open mouth.
This isn't real. He's not real.

REACTION AFTER READING THE BOOK

I cannot form the right words to express how much this book affected me.

It scared me.
It angered me.
It made me remember.
It made me realise how lucky I am to have gone out of a toxic relationship.

I wouldn't say that I was in an abusive relationship, but I guess it was about to lead to that if it went any further. And reading this book made me remember. And it was painful to remember.

What the character in this book went through was probably 50 times more brutal and vile that what I had gone through.Compared to this, mine is probably comparable to an ant bite. Aside from the abuse, she also had to deal with the after effects of it. Which was actually as painful for her as it was when she was being abused.

I would just like to get this out... I WANT TO FUCKING KILL THAT SADISTIC PSYCHOPATH SO BAD! I wanna chop him up and feed him to the dogs... I know it's a sick thought but man... I am so upset and angry with this person. He... was not a human being. How could anyone fucking not see how bad he was hurting Cathy?

Okay... I'll stop here and get on with the review.

THE GIST

Cathy used to be this lively, outgoing girl who loved to go out to bars and spend time with her friends. But after going through such a traumatic experience with her ex-boyfriend Lee, she changed.

The trouble was, this frightened person wasn't me. I was used to making conversation with people. I was vivacious, friendly, talkative. Keeping my mouth shut was always a struggle. I wondered if I would ever get used to it..

It all started when she met Lee. He was charming, attractive, sweet, and nice to her friends. They started to get more intimate and then started living together. But Lee was keeping a part of his life away from her. He doesn't tell her what type of job he has or where he really lived and all that. But Cathy didn't care at the time because he was perfect and their relationship was what she always wanted it to be.

But sweet and caring Lee actually had a more dark and twisted side. He was obsessive and manipulative. He was overly curious about everything she does. He needs to know everything she does and where is and what she's doing. She did not have any freedom of her own. Then when he doesn't get what he wants from her, he started to be more agressive. At first it was only during sex, but after a while... the hitting started... when he wasn't satisfied with that, he started doing more horrible shit.

Instead he stumbled, half-fell through the door, and as I rose from my seat to meet him his fist hit the side of my face with a crashing blow, sending me flying backwards into the side table..

She developed such an extreme case of obsessive-compulsive behaviour that it she had to check the doors, windows, locks, and everything at least 4-5 times. She couldn't connect well with people. She sees Lee everything. She was always anticipating that he would come back for her.

All of the time, day and night, my brain generates images of things that have happened to me and things that might happened. It's like watching a horror movie over and over again.

And he would... eventually.

MEET THE CHARACTERS

Cathy/Catherine

I loved Catherine. I loved how strong she was despite of all the hardships she had to encounter. You see her before and after and you get why she suddenly changed and how the change affected her and how she sees herself and everything else around her.

I'm not going to say I knew what she went through because I don't. But the author wrote her character so well that you get to feel what she feels, to hear her thoughts like it was your own. Every blow she receives from Lee made me cringe and it was almost as if I was the one at the receiving end. The author was really brilliant that way. She made you care about Cathy and how much she doesn't deserve all of the abuse and its aftermath.

The Abuser

The thing was about Lee, was that he started out pretty good. The author wrote him in a way where you would fall for him the same time Cathy does... So when he started getting abusive... You start to detest him because you develop feelings for him during the beginning of this book.

But then he started changing.... and then...

I hate him to death! Like I said earlier on the intro, I wanted to murder him and feed him to either the dogs or the sharks or whatever creature that could eat him... I know... Its brutal because that's what he deserves. What type of guy does that anyway? What type of guy punches a girl like she was nothing and leave her in a room almost bleeding to death? What type of human being does that??? Aww.. Goddamnit!! This is getting me so angry again.

Fucking sick sadistic psychopath!

Stuart

He's a guy in present Cathy's life. Someone she didn't want to let in but eventually did. And the good thing about him is, he wasn't the reason she wanted to get over her OCD, she wanted to do it because she wanted to get better. He's there for her, but not in a way that he wants to intrude on some things that Cathy wasn't ready to share.. He reminds me of my boyfie actually... ^__^ So yes, I liked this Stuart guy.

THE WRITING

I thought the writing was just phenomenal. I liked the way she used the alternating timelines to tell this story because it was really effective in getting to know what caused Cathy to be who she is in the present..

Also another thing I would like to comment on how she wrote Cathy during her OCD moments. Some people would get annoyed with it because of how repetitive some of the scenes were especially when Cathy was checking on the doors, the locks, windows and everything and then just does it again. I didn't find it annoying at all. I found it realistic and thoroughly researched on.

This book is very graphic, not only on the parts showing Cathy's OCD, but also during those times where she on the receiving end of the abuse. Goddamn... it was painful to read. It was so disturbingly realistic.

THE PLOT DEVELOPMENT

I think this book started very well. It started in a court room scene where they were asking Lee some questions. Then from then it went back and forth from before Cathy experienced the abuse and after. It was such an effective way to tell the story.

This book was so well paced. Each chapter has the exact amount of scenes and dialogues that will keep you wanting to turn the page and figure out what went on and how it came to a point where he became this dude's bobo doll.

FINAL WORDS

This book is amazing. I didn't find it amazing because of the topic, but how the topic was written and shared to the readers.

It will make you feel a mix of emotions based on the events that lead to the character's breakdown.
It will make you think about how you would react if you were in the same situation.
It will get you angry about how these things happen in real life
It will upset you to think that some people will never understand what people in the same situation is going through or have gone through.
It will make you realise that people close to you could not be who you thought they were.
It will make you appreciate how lucky you are with the partner that you have.

I don't think I could point out anything negative about this book. It was a bit of a nuisance to read about Cathy's repetitive actions, but I thought it was necessary so I was okay with it.

All in all, this book was a solid read.

Realistic characters and events.
Very on point writing.
Plot development was perfect.
The ending.. I thought it ended so well. It was an open ended ending.

I highly recommend this book. I think it's my first 5 stars for the year... I think... Eeehh.. I'd have to check, but yeah this book is a very good read. If you haven't read this one yet, please pick it up, most especially if you're into psychological thrillers.

MAJOR trigger warning - abuse, rape, domestic violence.

That being said, however, it was the most effective use of alternating past and present timelines that I’ve ever read.

I found this book to be a real page turner that kept me enthralled from beginning to end. The plot wasn't always entirely believable, but the story drew me in so completely that all I wanted to do was keep on turning the pages to find out what came next. I thought the author's portrayal of someone suffering from OCD was sensitively written, and it was very easy to relate to the character of Cathy and the situation she found herself in. A good read that is very hard to put down once you've started it. A good, solid four stars.